• Opinions expressed in this web page are not necessarily those of the staff and management of W9GR.
• Portions of this web page may have been mechanically reproduced.
• This web page produced with 100% post consumer recycled electrons.
• Some assembly is required. Hey, it's a kit; a LOT of assembly is required!
• Any resemblance of characters in this web page to actual persons, living or dead, is a coincidence.
• W9GR is in no way responsible for the contents of this web page.
• This web page was recorded live before a taped audience.
• This web page has been made possible by grants from The Corporation for Public Webcasting and your local WWW affiliate.
• For a transcript of this web page, send five dollars and mention web page number 807.
• This web page has been closed-captioned for the hearing impaired.
• Parents should consider whether children under 18 years of age should hear the sound clips on this web page.
• W9GR will not grant equal time to responsible parties with opposing viewpoints.
• Employees of W9GR and their families are not eligible.
• W9GR was the official displaced W9 station of the 1996 Olympics.
• This web page has been a reenactment of actual events.
• This limited warranty is the only warranty made by W9GR.
• The W9GR DSP-3 is guaranteed to be Year 2000 Compliant.
• Quantics is proud to be a non-ISO9000 certified company. We produce excellent products, not bureaucratic inefficiency.
• The software product and users's manual are provided "as is" and without warranty of any kind, either express or implied, including, but not limited to, the implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose.
• Some states do not allow the exclusion of implied warranties, so the above exclusion may not apply to you, except in Nebraska.
• This warranty gives you specific legal rights and you may also have other rights which vary from state to state, except in Nebraska.
• In no event will W9GR be liable for any damages, including any lost profits, lost savings, or other incidental or consequential damages arising out of the use, or inability to use W9GR software, even if W9GR or an authorized representative of W9GR has been advised of the possibility of such damages, or for any claim by any other party.
• Quantics reserves the right to make changes without further notice to any products herein.
• Quantics makes no warranty, representation or guarantee regarding the suitability of its products for any particular purpose, nor does Quantics assume any liability arising out of the application or use of any product or circuit, and specifically disclaims any and all liability, including without limitation consequential or incidental damages.
• Typical parameters which may be provided in Quantics data sheets and/or specifications can and do vary in different applications and actual performance may vary over time.
• All operating parameters, including Typicals must be validated for each customer application by customer's technical experts.
• Quantics does not convey any license under its patent rights nor the rights of others.
• Quantics products are not designed, intended, or authorized for use as components in systems intended for surgical implant into the body, or other applications intended to support or sustain life, or for any other application in which the failure of the Quantics product could create a situation where personal injury or death may occur. Should Buyer purchase or use Quantics products for any such unintended or unauthorized application, Buyer shall indemnify and hold Quantics and its officers, employees, subsidiaries, affiliates, and distributors harmless against all claims, costs, damages, and expenses, and reasonable attorney fees arising out of, directly or indirectly, any claim of personal injury or death associated with such unintended or unauthorized use, even if such claim alleges that Quantics was negligent regarding the design or manufacture of the part.
• Quantics and W9GR are registered trademarks of Quantics.
• Quantics is not an Equal Opportunity/Affirmative Action Employer. That's because we're not an employer.
• By breaking this seal, the user hereinafter agrees to abide by all the terms and conditions of the following agreement that nobody ever reads, as well as the Geneva Convention and the U.N. Charter and the Secret Membership Oath of the Benevolent Protective Order of the Elks and such other terms and conditions, real and imaginary, as W9GR shall deem necessary and appropriate, including the right to come to the user's home and examine the user's hard drive, as well as the user's underwear drawer if we feel like it, take it or leave it, until death do us part, one nation indivisible by the dawn's early light, finders keepers, losers weepers, thanks you've been a great crowd, and don't forget to tip your servers.
• Had this been an actual emergency, you would have been instructed where to tune up in your area.
• Specifications guaranteed only when operated into a 50 ohm load.
• Violators will be prosecuted
• Prosecutors will be violated.
• Traffic fines doubled in construction zones.
• Construction is doubled in traffic zones.
• Alcohol may intensify this effect.
• May cause drowsiness.
• These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration
• This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
• If pregnant, lactating, or on prescribed medication, consult your physician before using.
• You must be at least 18 years of age.
• Quantics products are not intended for use in life support appliances, devices, or systems. Use of a Quantics product in such applications without the written consent of the appropriate Quantics officer is prohibited.
• Batteries not included.
• If redness persists, consult a physician.
• Tax and license, dealer preparation charge not included.
• Void where prohibited by law.
• Check the white pages of your phonebook.
• The white zone is for loading and unloading.
• There is no stopping in a red zone.
• Duplication is subject to civil and criminal liabilities.
• Send by midnight tonight.
• Please include a self addressed stamped envelope.
• Dealer participation may affect final cost.
• If accidentally swallowed, do not induce vomiting.
• I'm not a doctor but I play one on TV.
• Slightly higher west of the rockies.
• Traffic fines doubled in construction zones.
• Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.
• Please be sure your tray tables and seat backs are locked in the upright position prior to takeoff.
• Not responsible for garments left over 30 days.
• Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.
• Your actual mileage may vary.
• Please have exact change ready.
• Celebrity voices impersonated.
• TV picture simulated.
• No user serviceable parts inside.
• For maximum freshness, use before date code indicated.
• In Nebraska, you'll be billed later.
• Flammable - do not use near fire or flame.
• Not available in any store.
• Not responsible for accidents.
• Close cover before striking.
• Please pick up a white courtesy phone for a message.
• Keep out of the reach of children.
• For continued protection, replace with a fuse of the same ratings.
• Unleaded gasoline only.
• Some assembly may be required, except in Nebraska.
• Use only in a well ventilated area.
• Offer limited to stock on hand.
• Selection varies by store.
• Check newspaper listings for a theater near you.
• Sealed for your protection.
• Microwave oven in use.
• Keep plastic wrap away from children.
• We will not be undersold.
• Competitors coupons will be honored, then torn to tiny bits.
• The use of portable radios, TVs, or breeder reactors during flight is prohibited.
• $300 fine for non-official use.
• Cooking times longer at high altitudes.
• No shirt, no shoes, no service.
• No substitutions please.
• Weight specified is before cooking.
• No refunds or exchanges.
• Equal housing lender.
• No late seating.
• Subject to search.
• Service charge not refundable if show is cancelled.
• ID required.
• Keep hands away from rotating blade.
• Order by credit card to avoid COD charges.
• Parental guidance is suggested.
• Vehicle makes frequent stops.
• Use of this ticket is subject to the provisions of the Warsaw Convention.
• Please check box if want one dollar to go to federal election campaign funds.
• Not affiliated with the International Red Cross.
• Not responsible for accidental vehicle damage or theft.
• Remove battery during prolonged storage.
• The right is reserved to refuse service to any person at any time.
• The Surgeon General has warned that use of this product by pregnant women may result in fetal injury, premature birth, and low birth weight.
• All brand names are registered trade marks of their respective owners.
• You can't buy one, you can only get them in boxes of BREEZE.
• Do not back up or severe tire damage will occur.
• I'm a doctor who plays an actor on TV.
• Available in decorator colors, regular, and menthol.
• In case of prizes, duplicate ties will be awarded.
• Travelers over 18 must supply a photo ID.
• RVs and other slow vehicles must pull over when five or more vehicles are following.
• Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
• Sold only for the prevention of disease.
• WARNING: This Product Warps Space and Time in Its Vicinity.
• WARNING: This Product Attracts Every Other Piece of Matter in the Universe, Including the Products of Other Manufacturers, with a Force Proportional to the Product of the Masses and Inversely Proportional to the Distance Between Them.
• CAUTION: The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight.
• HANDLE WITH EXTREME CARE: This Product Contains Minute Electrically Charged Particles Moving at Velocities in Excess of Five Hundred Million Miles Per Hour.
• CONSUMER NOTICE: Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," It Is Impossible for the Consumer to Find Out at the Same Time Both Precisely Where This Product Is and How Fast It Is Moving.
• ADVISORY: There is an Extremely Small but Nonzero Chance That, Through a Process Know as "Tunneling," This Product May Spontaneously Disappear from Its Present Location and Reappear at Any Random Place in the Universe, Including Your Neighbor's Domicile. The Manufacturer Will Not Be Responsible for Any Damages or Inconvenience That May Result.
• READ THIS BEFORE OPENING PACKAGE: According to Certain Suggested Versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the Primary Particles Constituting this Product May Decay to Nothingness Within the Next Four Hundred Million Years.
• THIS IS A 100% MATTER PRODUCT: In the Unlikely Event That This Merchandise Should Contact Antimatter in Any Form, a Catastrophic Explosion Will Result.
• PUBLIC NOTICE AS REQUIRED BY LAW: Any Use of This Product, in Any Manner Whatsoever, Will Increase the Amount of Disorder in the Universe. Although No Liability Is Implied Herein, the Consumer Is Warned That This Process Will Ultimately Lead to the Heat Death of the Universe.
• NOTE: The Most Fundamental Particles in This Product Are Held Together by a "Gluing" Force About Which Little is Currently Known and Whose Adhesive Power Can Therefore Not Be Permanently Guaranteed.
• ATTENTION: Despite Any Other Listing of Product Contents Found Herein, the Consumer is Advised That, in Actuality, This Product Consists Of 99.9999999999% Empty Space.
• NEW GRAND UNIFIED THEORY DISCLAIMER: The Manufacturer May Technically Be Entitled to Claim That This Product Is Ten- Dimensional. However, the Consumer Is Reminded That This Confers No Legal Rights Above and Beyond Those Applicable to Three-Dimensional Objects, Since the Seven New Dimensions Are "Rolled Up" into Such a Small "Area" That They Cannot Be Detected.
• PLEASE NOTE: Some Quantum Physics Theories Suggest That When the Consumer Is Not Directly Observing This Product, It May Cease to Exist or Will Exist Only in a Vague and Undetermined State.
• COMPONENT EQUIVALENCY NOTICE: The Subatomic Particles (Electrons, Protons, etc.) Comprising This Product Are Exactly the Same in Every Measurable Respect as Those Used in the Products of Other Manufacturers, and No Claim to the Contrary May Legitimately Be Expressed or Implied.
• HEALTH WARNING: Care Should Be Taken When Lifting This Product, Since Its Mass, and Thus Its Weight, Is Dependent on Its Velocity Relative to the User.
• IMPORTANT NOTICE TO PURCHASERS: The Entire Physical Universe, Including This Product, May One Day Collapse Back into an Infinitesimally Small Space. Should Another Universe Subsequently Re-emerge, the Existence of This Product in That Universe Cannot Be Guaranteed.
• By US Code Title 47, Sec.227(a)(2)(B), a computer/modem/printer meets the definition of a telephone fax machine. By Sec.227(b)(1)(C), it is unlawful to send any unsolicited advertisement to such equipment. By Sec.227(b)(3)(C), a violation of the aforementioned Section is punishable by action to recover actual monetary loss, or $500, whichever is greater, for each violation.
• This web page does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my company, my friends, or my cat.
• Don't quote me on that.
• Don't quote me on anything.
• All rights reserved.
• You may distribute this web page freely but you may not make a profit from it.
• Web pages are subject to change without notice.
• Web pages are slightly enlarged to show detail.
• Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental.
• Do not remove this web page under penalty of law.
• Hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat.
• Do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle.
• Confidentiality Notice: This web page contains confidential information which is privileged. The information is intended only for the use of the intended recipient named above. If you are not the intended recipient you are hereby notified that any disclosure, copying, distribution, or the taking of any action in reliance on the contents of this web page information except its direct delivery to the intended recipient named above is strictly prohibited. If you have received this web page in error, please notify us immediately by e-mail to arrange for return of web documents to us.
• Your mileage may vary.
• No substitutions allowed.
• For a limited time only.
• This offer is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted.
• Caveat emptor.
• Product is provided "as is" without any warranties.
• User assumes full responsibility.
• An equal opportunity web page employer.
• No shoes, no shirt, no web pages.
• Quantities are limited while supplies last.
• If any defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself, but return to an authorized service center.
• Read at your own risk.
• Parental advisory - explicit lyrics.
• Text may contain explicit materials some readers may find objectionable; parental guidance is advised.
• Keep away from sunlight.
• Keep away from pets and small children.
• Limit one-per-family please.
• No money down.
• No purchase necessary.
• You need not be present to win.
• Some assembly required.
• Batteries not included.
• Instructions are included.
• Action figures sold separately
• This product contains no (zero) jewels.
• No preservatives added.
• Slippery when wet.
• Safety goggles may be required during use.
• Sealed for your protection, do not use if safety seal is broken.
• Call before you dig.
• This item is intended only to be used as a can cooler and not as a flotation device for cats, guinea pigs, squirrels, or other unsuspecting wildlife.
• Not liable for damages arising from use or misuse.
• For external use only.
• If rash, irritation, redness, or swelling develops, discontinue use.
• Use only with proper ventilation.
• Avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place.
• Keep away from open flames.
• Avoid contact with eyes and skin and avoid inhaling fumes.
• Do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit.
• Do not place near a flammable or magnetic source.
• Smoking these web pages could be hazardous to your health.
• The best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a condom.
• No salt, MSG, artificial color or flavoring added.
• Stock prices are delayed 15 minutes.
• If ingested, do not induce vomiting, and if symptoms persist, consult a physician.
• Web pages are ribbed for your pleasure.
• Possible penalties for early withdrawal.
• Offer valid only at participating Usenet sites.
• Slightly higher west of the Rockies.
• Allow four to six weeks for delivery.
• Must be 18 to enter.
• Disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes and other Acts of God, neglect, damage from improper installation, incorrect line voltage, improper or unauthorized repair, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in the web page list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, mud slides, forest fire, or projectile (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BBs, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.).
• Other restrictions may apply.
• If something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on.
• No animals were harmed in the production of this web page.
• This warranty is a promise by us to you as the user that we will repair certain faults. It is not a warranty, guarantee, or promise that your product will conform to its specification or will not fail.
• Length of financing may affect rate.
• Deposits may not be available for immediate withdrawal.
• The Post Office will not deliver mail without postage.
• Effective January 1, 1983, this notice becomes part of the conditions of contract between the airline and the passenger. If there is any inconsistency between the incorporated terms described below and the terms and conditions in the passenger's ticket, these incorporated terms govern.
• Air transportation to be provided between points in the U.S. (including its overseas territories and possessions) is subject to the individual terms of the transporting air carriers, which are herein incorporated by reference and made part of the contract of carriage. Foreign air transportation is governed by applicable tariffs on file with the U.S. and other governments. Incorporated terms may include, but are not restricted to:
• l. Limits on liability for personal injury or death.
• 2. Limits on liability for baggage, including fragile or perishable goods, and availability of excess valuation coverage.
• 3. Claims restrictions, including time periods in which passengers must file a claim or bring an action against the air carrier.
• 4. Rights of the air carrier to change terms of the contract.
• 5. Rules on reconfirmation of reservations, check-in times, and refusal to carry.
• 6. Rights of the air carrier and limits on liability for delay or failure to perform service, including schedule changes, substitution of alternate air carriers or aircraft and rerouting.
• You can obtain additional information on items 1through 6 above at any U.S. location where the transporting air carrier's tickets are sold.
• You have the right to inspect the full text of each transporting air carrier's terms at its airport and city ticket offices. You also have the right, upon request, to receive free of charge the full text of the applicable terms incorporated by reference from each of the transporting air carriers. information on ordering the full text of each air carrier's terms is available at any U.S. location where the air carrier's tickets are sold.
• Purchase nonrefundable ticket by June 12 for travel by September 24. Seats are limited.
• Fare does not include airport tax of 3 to 6 dollars. Nonstops not offered to all destinations. Other restrictions apply.
• If the passenger's journey involves an ultimate destination or stop in a country other than the country of departure, the Warsaw Convention may be applicable and the Convention governs and in most cases limits the liability of carriers for death or personal injury and for loss of or damage to baggage.
• Option to purchase at end of lease based on 12,000 miles per year on approval of credit. Finance charges accrue from date of sale.
• All prices plus tax, license, and dock fees.
• All entries must be postmarked. No photocopies or mechanically reproduced entries will be accepted. Not responsible for lost, misdirected, damaged, incomplete, or illegible mail. Odds of winning are based on number of entries. Winner is responsible for all applicable taxes. Offer limited to stock on hand.
• Lease 299 a month for 36 months 6579.26 cash total of payments 11625.48 lease end value 22214.98 based on 15,000 miles per year on approval of credit; one at this price, VIN # 140197 85 Pontiac Fiero 3995, VIN # 224432, call 1-800-916-LEXUS for details.
• Random drawing will be conducted under supervision of an independent judging organization whose decisions are final.
• Limit: one prize per family or household.
• Prizes not transferable.
• Winners will be notified and may be required to complete an affidavit of eligibility/liability - publicity release which must be signed and returned so that it is received within 14 days of date printed on notification or alternate winners will be selected at random.
• Failure to comply results in forfeiture of all rights to prize. Guests accompanying travel prize winner must sign and return liability/publicity release prior to travel.
• If a prize or prize notification letter is returned as undeliverable, prize is forfeited and an alternate winner will be selected in a random drawing.
• Prizes fulfilled within approximately 60 days of recept of executed affidavits and releases.
• All taxes on prizes and other expenses related to prizes not specified herein are the responsibility of the winners.
• Acceptance of prizes constitutes permission (except where prohibited) to user winners names, hometowns, and likenesses for promotional purposes without additional compensation.
• Winners and their travel companions, and their respective heirs, assigns, executors and administrators, release and exempt the sponsor and its respective officers, employees and agents (collectively "Releasees") from any and all actions, claims, and demands which they have or may acquire by reason of loss arising out of their use of any prize, including but not limited to personal injury or death.
• Minors must be accompanied by an adult on all trips.
• All the opinions expressed in this posting are mine, all mine and nothing but mine, and have nothing at all to do with my employer. Unless, of course, they are particularly witty, interesting or generally worth a lot of money.
• Please excuse any errors in the above. Occasional lapses of omniscience is the price I pay for being implementable.
• This disclaimer disclaims the disclamation of its disclaimancy and anything else you want to be disclaimed.
• The thoughts presented herein are dictated to me by people I do not know, and over whom I have no control whatsoever.
• Nothing I say can be taken down and used in evidence against me and that goes for my dog too.
• According to my latest profit-sharing report, I speak for a little less than 0.00001% of Tektronix.
• I'm not even allowed to post a proper disclaimer, let alone the opinions of this Institution!
• My opinion is that people are too opinionated about opinions and offer unnecessary opinions on whose opinions they actually are... but that's just my opinion.
• I didn't do it... I wouldn't refuse to deny that I had dismissed the thought of not doing it, but I didn't do it.
• The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of my employer, or, for that matter, any other fellow human beings or other worldly inhabitants. They just spew forth.
• The opinions stated herein are my own to my knowledge. If, however, you happen to agree with me, they can be yours too, after paying me the required fee.
• Opinions this ludicrous are mine. Reasonable opinions will cost you.
• I disclaim that there is any claim on this disclaimer (or, so I claim).
• Avoid eye contact. In case of contact, flush mind for 15 minutes. See a psychiatrist if irritation persists. Not to be taken seriously. Keep out of sight of children.
• The usual disclaimers apply anywhere you can find a sticky spot.
• My employers seldom even LISTEN to my opinions.
• If Tektronix agreed with what I said, I'd get paid a lot more.
• Read carefully before you invest or send money.
• Must be accompanied or preceded by a prospectus.
• Disclaimer: Ok, I don't claim her
• These onions are MINE and not those of my EMPLOYER. No, wait, that should be OPINIONS. I have no idea whose onions these are.
• Seat availability is limited and seats may not be available on all flights.
• Travel for qualifying trips must occur between 2/12 and 2/13.
• Fares are one-way requiring a round-trip purchase 21 days in advance or 28 days in advance during leap years.
• Minimum stay of 4 days is required, except for Tuesday departures which require a 7 day minimum stay.
• Fares are non-refundable and may not be available when you call.
• Passenger must be a Sagittarius, unless the moon is in Jupiter.
• Fares may be higher for travel on peak days, summer solstice, and employee birthdays.
• Travel must commence by 5/3 for frequent flyer members and between enrollment date and 5/6 for new members.
• A Saturday night stay is required, but if originating on a Saturday, only a Wednesday morning stay is required.
• Tickets may be used only when accompanied by a lawyer.
• Phoenix-to-Los Angeles route may include unannounced stops in Atlanta or Madrid.
• Fares do not include "nonpertainable aviation compensation fees," which may be extra.
• Sale tickets prohibit the use of restrooms during flights.
• Fares are subject to random adjustments on five minutes notice.
• Seat availability is limited and some passengers may be required to stand.
• Travel is valid in the Continental U.S. only and the Central Time Zone only on alternate Sundays.
• Reservations are required.
• No jeans, T-shirts, sandals, shorts, striped or polka-dotted clothing may be worn by passengers holding sale tickets.
• This offer not valid in conjunction with any discount coupon, voucher, certificate or promotional offer by any airline, video rental outlet or supermarket.
• Tickets may be given to family members except second cousins and relatives who never call or write but visit every year at Christmas time.
• Identification and/or character witnesses may be required.
• Terms and conditions are subject to change without notice.
• Stopovers not allowed.
• Not valid for travel during months ending in "R." This offer void were prohibited by law, where people just don't like it, or wherever you happen to live.
• For a complete list of new and amended regulations associated with this offer, keep watching this space on this web page.
• IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word "absquatulation" has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites and place it in a warm oven for 40 minutes. Whisk briefly and let it stand for 2 hours.

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